May 30, 2013
Look out! There's a game out there growing in popularity on an EPIC SCALE. Hell no it's not a video game, it's something that the whole family can enjoy (except the children who be terribly scarred and confused by this horrific game). Get your old granny and your band of misfit friends together and have a good old bundle of piss covered laughs, cuz this is one hell of a game.
Okay so I've never played apples to apples, (I know...Blasphemy, Missing out, the whole 9 yards) but what I have played is this game. And from what I understand it is like ata's sexually frustrated demonic cousin who shits in odd places around the house while he's visiting. I know, What the fuck, I know, but it's totally worth it. Trust me.
So the game starts out like this:
1) Bunch of white cards and bunch of black cards on the table which are slowly picked from throughout the game.
2) Get like min 4 people in a little circle and deal out 10 cards each. The more people the better I've found, but you can always add Rando Cardrizian who is a random white card played alongside everyone else as if another player was there.
3) One person starts off by taking a black card, reading it and placing it on the table for all to see.
4) Everyone inspects their white cards and chooses according to funniness or quality of answer depending on what the card said (Some questions need 2 white card answers) and they are placed face down for the black card holder to shuffle and read randomly.
5) Hopefully able to keep their whits about them while reading the white cards associated with black question card, the player then decides which card best fits or is the most ridiculous/funny answer of the bunch.
6) The winner is given the black card and you can rotate the to the next person.
Now this game is played many ways and has many other varying rules, that was basically how I've always played it. What's fun about this game is that it feeds off that inner terrible self that everyone tries to hide inside and comes out in the form of obscene answers.
Here are some examples, just to name a few:
Black card: What would grandma find disturbing, but oddly charming?
White card: Being a dick to children.
Black Card: What's a girl's best friend?
White Card: The milk man.
Black Card: The Gym teacher got fired for adding ______ to the obstacle course.
White Card: Fuck Mountain.
You wanna know what the absolute best part of this game is? You can make your own freakin cards...That's right, Copy off blank ones and make your own friggen game. They say it will probably cost you roughly 10 bucks in ink and paper, but you're allowed to make them say whatever your little fucked up heart desires. So go ahead, be brave and ruin some lives with your outrageously inappropriate cards that will probably get you punched in the face by your best friend. But it was worth it.
Take it from me people, this game will make your head hurt from hours of laughter and probably will make at least one of your family members piss their pants. I don't advise going through the entire deck on your first go at this game though. Play til somebody gets 10 cards (Fucking Rando) and then play again after you're all piss drunk and can't even say the black card without laughing. Have a good time with it and don't be afraid to cross over those politically correct boundaries, that's why this game is called Cards AGAINST Humanity.
Happy gaming players.